Season, Reason or for a Lifetime

For days now, I am contemplating whether I should respond to the letter that I got from this person who really broke my heart. It's actually a short letter saying how sorry he was with all the things that has happened and how things are between me and him.

I felt that the letter was not something that I would be happy and it's also not something that I am mad about. In fact, I think I lost it already. I lost the feelings that I once strongly have for him.

I felt him when I was reading his message, I felt his regret over the fact that these things happened, I felt that he is truly and did care for me but the truth is...it's was never enough. Not enough to fight for whatever we have.

On the day that I saw his email message, I was surprised because I never really expect him to send that letter of sorry and asking for forgiveness. I felt sad for him because I have accepted the fact that there's no US anymore. I wasn't sorry for what happened because I learned to accept and moved on with my life. If I may share, this was one wish granted by St. Jude. I pray for serenity and clarity for my decision and he did lead the way.

A poet once say that people do come into your life....either they are for a season, reason or for a lifetime. For years, I made myself believe that he's for a lifetime because he's so close to perfect. But now I do know that he's just a season and a reason for me to believe that once upon a time...somebody loved me so much, somebody cared for me so much, somebody adored me so much and since that somebody is already gone. I have my whole lifetime to take delight and do whatever it takes without limitations and be happy and enjoy my journey in life.

Shopping...a stress buster sport

Yesterday, we went to the mall with one end in mind....to simply watch I AM NUMBER FOUR. We arrived around 4:45 and was thinking of doing some window shopping first or have an early dinner since the movie wouldn't start 'till 6:00pm or we can go for the 9:00pm slot. Well, it didn't surprised me much when only a few hours had gone by and I already had some paper bags in my hand...hahahaha! My boys went crazy when we pass by Data Blitz and of course ask me to buy them new Xbox games. Then we pass by Power MAC center and with enough "lambing" and some persuasion; I bought RJ his Skull Candy headphone. As for me, I cannot resist the computer bag that I have been eying. That bag has been calling me...buy me buy me...hahaha!

It's almost dinner time when we went to Shoe Salon and found this comfortable slip ons....good thing my boys said..."Mom, let's eat first and think it over" Wheew!!! I almost bought those pairs.

Oh well, who said shopping isn't fun and a true stress buster.

Until our next shopping.

3 Elements of Healing

Early this evening, I happen to visit my new found friend in a church near and beside the Malacanang. And today I learned that true healing comes from accepting the things as they are and for what we have.

Physical and Spiritual healing requires both faith, hope and trust. In the absence of the other, complete physical and spiritual healing will never take place. Come to think of it, how many times do we put our faith, hope and trust with our Doctors of choice whenever we are physically ill and sick. What more if we surrender all our worries, anxiety and doubts to our Spiritual Healer...Jesus Christ.

The message of the Homily was quite simple and straight forward but it left a huge impact on me that I said to myself I need to create a blog for this because I want to illuminate and share the wisdom I gain today.

Before I retire to bed today, I pray that I may continue to grow and know HIM more.

Sweet Revenge

For months I kept quiet and kept still and I said to myself that I long to see the day that I will have my sweet revenge. And today was "the day" that I have been waiting for. I got want I wanted when he showed to my doorstep with his sheepish smile as if nothing happened.  Well, sweetheart you dealt with one seasoned lady here....so I did gracefully welcome him and deliver what I have to deliver. And sorry for you...I don't crack under pressure. I know how to play cards very well and I could be the queen of sarcasm. And he definitely got a dose of it....and oh boy I must say that those simple words really rock you to the very core.

This indeed is my sweetest revenge ever!

A certain sadness...

I have been feeling a little sadness for several days now and most of my friends don't quite notice it because I simply know how to handle myself in front of them.  In fact, they would always see me as the funny one who has no qualms in making fun of myself.  Friends do see as someone who is very strong willed and very sure of what I want and who I am.  But these feeling of sadness lurks just before I will retire to bed, it's a feeling that really hit to my very core.  I have been wanting to really face this but I kept on pushing it.  I have been wanting to dissect and see my options to finally overcome this feeling of sadness.

Desperately, I pray for more time and discernment because I still believe in my heart that HE has grand plans for me...plans that are even better of what I think is good for me.  I hope that day will come that I will be able to deal with this certain sadness...

And you think I can't bake...hmmmp!

Just recently I bought a Lagermania oven thinking and hoping to bake a cake one day.  So now that I am in the process of learning how to cook and bake,  it just amazes me everytime I see my end product and even more excited if people do taste what I bake and cook.  Most especially if it turn out just perfect!  It's a feeling of fulfillment and joy (babaw noh).

Since I was little, I used to watched my aunties baked their goodies either for family or sometimes they would sell it.  And I envy them (in a good way), because cooking is very second nature to them.  Even my mother, she is indeed a very good cook, not only because she's my mom and she's Kapampangan but you should really get hold of her "TO DIE FOR" Beef Mechado, Adobong Pusit, Pansit Guisado and many more.

Now that I am baking, I really do find joy in these menial things....easy as you may think and say...but hey...look who's baking now.

Let's go to bed already...

I am so excited for my kids to open their Christmas presents later...YES I AM! Sssshhh...got them the one present that they ever wanted....ROCKBAND (Beatles Limited Edition) plus bought another CD game for them to choose several songs just in case they got tired of playing with Beatles songs.  Ooooppsss the surprise doesn't ends there yet...I had the Nintendo Wii wrapped also.  I got the Limited Edition (Color Red)! Yes, my friends I got the red one har har har!!!

So you think after the Mass and Noche Buena we are going to bed already? I don't think so!